July, 2011:

“I have to work late.”

I hear clients say that when they tell me they’re intending to cancel a session.

And I wonder – do you really “have” to work late? Or are you just letting someone else’s desire or request come before your personal health?

And I wonder this authentically. I used to tell myself “I have to work late” all the time when I worked for non-profit organizations. “If I don’t do it, it won’t get done…we’re short staffed and I have to help…only just this once…if I say ‘no thanks’ will my boss fire me?” The versions of “I have to work late” are many.  Ah, to think of all the missed dinners with friends; the missed sunsets; the missed times with my partner. One can not re-do, so I do not regret as much as use those experiences as motivation to not make the same choice again.

My practice (and suggestion) is:

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There is never enough. There’s no such thing as “enough.” There is only what is. There is only how I’m being and what I’m doing in any one moment (and it’s even questionable as to whether or not those are two different things).

I withhold pleasures of life – awaiting a time when I’ve done “enough” work or am good “enough” to deserve them.

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When you pass on from life in this body, and people gather to remember you and what they learned from you being in their life, what will they say?

That can be a challenging question to seriously consider – we generally want to avoid the idea. But being honestly aware of it can inspire the way we live. Perhaps we’ll appreciate the moment more, consider sharing more love than hate or gossip, and maybe help others more often.

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